Tuesday, February 2, 2010

The Count Down...


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Well...it is official! I am leaving Atlanta! I know you are thinking..."So?"...! Atlanta was a big move for me!!! I took a chance!!! I believed in myself and I believed in a city that was foreign to me! I never saw this coming!!?? Or, at least...I didn't WANT this to happen!!! This city has been surprisingly very GOOD to me!!! I have never met sooooo many people who genuinely cared and wanted to help!!! I expect this from a small town, being that I have lived in so many...but not a big city! I expected the city to be cold and indifferent, but that has not been my experience here! I hated it when I first moved here!!! I missed the "familiar"...the one thing I was trying to get away from!!! But the people here made a difference!!! They supported me and made the transition easier!!! Thank you, Atlanta!!! I know that a good thing will come from all this...I feel it in my heart!!! It is just not the time for Atlanta...



Funny how things change as we get older??? When my Mother was alive, she was somewhat a Gypsy herself!!! I remember her saying to me...that the older she got, the more afraid she became! Afraid of change...of being alone...! When we are young, we don't think about those things so much! We don't think at ALL!!! We just...go...! People ask me what it is that I am looking for??? Why do I have this "itch" that fuels my desire to "go"...! In this case, I just flat out don't have a choice, but in the past...I don't know??? I think I have been looking for "home"...! I am not sure where that is??? But, I believe I have spent my entire life searching for it!!! Am I afraid??? Maybe I am??? I too am getting older, though I never saw it that way until now!!?? What is so different today??? Maybe I found...home??? Maybe all this is so hard for me because I don't want to leave because I feel I belong here...! Maybe I think too much??? Maybe getting "older" has more to do with ((choice)) then years!!?? *smile*


"Virus of the Mind"--Making life decisions against your own instincts, because someone told you too!!! They told you that you were incapable...and you believed them!!! I have to ask...where are "they"...? Did "they" stick around?? Or did they implant these negative thoughts...this "virus"...in your brain, never to be seen again??? Funny how ((little)) they had to do with your life, to have changed it so much!!! Funny how you allow these people to have this kind of effect on your life...!!! It is a sickness...it can take your life away from you!!! So I say, take 500mg of "no thanx" daily!!! Do what feels right for you!!! It is your life...
I have always had a problem with someone telling me how to live and what to do with my life, when it didn't feel natural...or "organic" to me...! I will take good advice, as long as it's not "hands-off" advice!!! I conform nicely if it makes SENSE!!! When my Dad said to me, "If everyone jumped off a bridge, would you?"...I took that very seriously!!! HELL no!!! I don't like the fact that I can't live where I want, because I can't afford it!! I don't like the fact that the quality of my son's education depends on how "thick or thin" my wallet is!!?? I have found myself, here lately, arranging and re-arranging our life decisions based on all this!!! I don't want to limit the quality of life or education because someone far removed from "my world" has made decisions for me!!?? I see the signs, man!!! I got the VIRUS!!! lol! So....I have been taking my 500mg of "no thanx" daily and I have decided to homeschool!!! Something I have always supported and even more so today! I wanted to live in Atlanta! That was my choice! But I can't afford to live where my son will get a decent education...so...we will homeschool!!! In fact...we are doing the "traveling home school"...! So, basically...the world is our limit!!! I am very excited about that!!! I will keep you posted!!!


Okay...off to packing and "getting this show on the road"...


4 comments:

  1. Girl, i am on stand by with a truck and trailer? I am sorry that life has put this road block out! I and Gerrilyn are excited about you and Cooper being closer!!!!! I LOVE YOU AND AM RIGHT HERE <3

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  2. Thank you Sistah! Everything happens for a reason!!! Kiss!

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  3. Come back when you can. We'll keep the light on for you!

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